Trooper Criss Turnipseed of Troop G looks to be having a severe, paralyzing, fast-attacking, no-going-back, nightmarish panic attack! I can hear you asking the question out loud to yourself.  What in the world could have him so torn up?  Could it be that he was driving the trooper car in the background and hit a parked trooper car?  No. Could it be that he saw himself in the reflection of that patrol car?  Well, maybe… Could it be that he discovered that someone keyed his car?  No.  Could it be that he found a spot on his freshly washed and waxed car just seconds before the big troop inspection?  Oh yeah!  Now you can just feel the goose-bumps jumping up on the back of your neck if that was YOUR car in not-so-clean condition before this big event.  Have no fear! As a seasoned member of the Mississippi Highway Patrol, Trooper Turnipseed knew exactly how to save the day and salvage his inspection.  You see, this is where that old adage of “spit shine” came from.  Once upon a time, there was a trooper, just like our Turnipseed, going through an inspection.  He found a spot on his car just after washing it.  This once upon a time trooper had no water around him, so he improvised!  A little spit, a dry rag, some elbow grease, and thus the term “spit shine” was born! Now back to our Trooper Turnipseed.  Just after the panic set in after seeing the tarnished dirty spot, he quickly regained his composure and took care of that little dirty spot leaving a perfect “spit shined” trooper car. Well that’s about all that we can tell you.  Turnipseed did have a perfectly clean car that day, but we’ve never been able to determine from sources close to Troop G if he passed inspection.  If you or anyone you know has information, please pass it on.  And to Trooper Turnipseed, looks like a little panic can make for complete perfection!

Okay, take a really close look at this photo.  Look again. Now what did you see?  A smiling trooper?  A man with no watch? A stack of boxes labeled “handle with care” biological specimen samples? A pretty sunshiney day? A blue car in the background? A trooper happy to take the goods in as a result of those DUI arrests? A smart trooper just trying to save his district a little postage money by hand delivering? Or did you see a biological hazard sticker at the bottom of the box? Trooper Luke Harrington looks a little too, hmmm how should we say, eager-beaver happy to be taking “biological specimens” to the crime lab!  Is this photo what it really looks like where a trooper is just doing his job delivering samples or is there more to the photo? For example, are these Luke Harrington clone cells?  Let’s all ponder that thought for a moment…  Okay, composure regained now. There’s one thing for sure, Trooper Harrington is just tickled to be the happy delivery man for these biological hazardous boxes even if we don’t know what classified stuff is inside them!  Well maybe there’s just one more thing for sure… he looks like this because he’s loving his job - samples and all!

Now here’s a picture that you don’t see everyday! This would be our very own Trooper Justin Alsup of Troop G (the one on the LEFT) and Heismann-Trophy-Winning-All-Time-Great-Gator’s-Quarterback Tim Tebow (the one on the RIGHT as if you needed to be told that). One naturally might ask how these two just happened to be in a photo together. Could it be that Trooper Alsup is giving him some throwing pointers; or is Trooper Alsup asking for an autograph; or is Trooper Alsup on a super-duper-top-secret protection detail; is Trooper Alsup his cousin; or is Trooper Alsup posing after writing Tebow a ticket; or is Trooper Alsup secretly and confidentially in training as his replacement? As you ponder which of these scenarios is correct, you might want to know that Whether playing for the Gator’s or waiting on the draft to go with the Patriot’s or our favorite… the Saints, Tim Tebow is a huge fan of Mississippi State Troopers! That could be because of his other friend - Trooper Ray Hall of Troop F, whom he knows through mission trips. If you think about it… being a world-class football player is a lot like being a Mississippi Trooper! How you ask? They both play a little offense and a little defense; they all play by the rules; they win some and lose some; they work with the utmost of integrity; and they all do better when they work as a team! The headline of this “Trooper Showcase” might have you thinking that the BEST of the Best is about our friend Tebow. It’s actually reflective of Tim Tebow, Trooper Alsup, and ALL Mississippi State Troopers… The BEST of the Best!

What in the world could Troopers Scott Swaterbury Squaterbury TACbury Waterbury and Cole Adams be pointing at in that closet?  Well, all we can tell you about this top secret, completely classified closet is that you’ll soon find out!  Maybe some of you already know.  It’s a lot of little boxes. This is so very top secret that we cannot even disclose the location of the boxes in the closet. Needless to say that it is under lock and key, so don’t even try to snoop around and find these boxes.   We’ll give you a clue.  Given the Mississippi State “Santa” hat that Cole is wearing would indicate that these boxes got here sometime in December before Christmas.  Still can’t guess?  They both look very excited about what’s in the boxes in the confidential closet.  Here’s another clue.  It is obvious by the sheer number of brown boxes in this closet which is at an undisclosed location that there are a lot of these “things” that Waterbury and Adams are tickeled about.  What’s that?  You still can’t guess the items that are in the boxes?  Well here’s your last clue.  The items that have been shipped in the brown boxes which are being held in this closet in a secure and secret location are not perishable.  If you still can’t figure it out, then you’ll have to wait a while.  Either until you are shown what’s in the little brown boxes that are housed in the top secret, completely classified closet, or you’ll read about it in the upcoming magazine!